Every day is fresh, with no mistakes in it.

"Where's the joy?" I asked myself Monday mid-morning as I buttered English muffins for snack time. The day was going well. I'd started right, time spent in prayer and scripture first thing, then time spent planning the day. I was plowing through my list with determination, if not enthusiasm. Wash sheets and towels, clean the bathroom including the bathtub, plan supper, sweep kitchen floor, wash mirrors and dirty windows... I was making good progress, keeping myself going, but still the whole morning felt like drudgery, and the boys felt like anchors around my legs with their whining and complaints and new messes. Why don't I feel satisfied when I'm doing all I set out to do?
Tuesday, yesterday morning, I braced myself. Moms and kids coming for our moms' group at 9:30. Always the pressure is on to get as much accomplished as possible on mornings when guests are coming. Always the extra messes created by the boys are less tolerable on those mornings. Always I misjudge and don't leave myself enough time to get all I want to done before they arrive. Thankfully, my productive day Monday left me with just the basics to do Tuesday morning. Vacuum. Wash the floors. Make a coffee cake and coffee to share at snack time. I relaxed and let the boys be boys while we cleaned and prepared. I smiled at them and helped them and loved them. Christopher Robin emptied the dishwasher for me on his own initiative, chattering cheerfully to me the whole time. Peanut Butter was cooperative and sweet. I did have enough time, and when 9:30 arrived all was ready.
What was the difference between my two mornings? Some days are better than others. Maybe Monday really was just a bad morning for the boys. Maybe it was just a bad morning for me. But I realized that Monday, in all my goal setting and agenda-making, I hadn't left much room for thankfulness. I was so focused I didn't have attention to spare on appreciating the small things. Or giving thanks to my Maker. Abiding in Him and letting Him guide my actions and responses. And I felt no joy or pleasure in the day, no matter how well it set me up for a good morning the next day. I think my priorities were jumbled, and my list of things to do was at the top, instead of honoring Christ with my attitude, treating my little ones with patience and kindness, breathing thanks for all I've been given.
I feel like I KNOW all the right things, but I can't seem to get them right.
I need forgiveness and mercy. Thank you, Lord, for continually washing me clean.